It was snowing.
I was supposed to be on vacation but I had just been transferred to a new store and my store manager was on vacation, which means mine was canceled.
I was in the left lane and was two exits from my work. The Wrecker's "leave the pieces" was blasting from the speakers and I was in the zone.
I had never been scared to drive in the snow.
Plus, the roads were slushy they weren't snow covered.
Suddenly an armored car swerved into my lane.
I swerved left and the next thing I knew I was fishtailing every which way.
The back of the armored car collided with the front of my car and sent me left into the jersey barrier.
From there my car was spinning out of control. The last thing I remember was "leave the pieces" in the background and me letting go of the steering wheel.
My car ended up head first into the right jersey barrier.
Miraculously I didn't hit any other cars.
I must have bumped my head because I don't remember the impact. All I remember is trying to open my door and get out, and the smell. The powder from the air bag, the engine fluids, what an awful smell.
I was okay but my knee bashed the steering column, my forearm was bruised and I had a burn across my throat from the air bag.
The only thing I asked for was a ride to work. I had to get to work. The officer on the scene gave me a ride but suggested I go to the hospital. After I got to work I realized I was in shock and called my mother. I told her what had happened and she and my father rushed to pick me up. They brought me straight to the hospital. I was pretty beat up, especially my right knee. The doctor prescribed me percosets.
My mom filled the prescription and brought me home, to my parents house. I told them I just wanted to go to my place and crawl into bed.
My parents drove me home.
James met me at my place and showered me with valentines gifts and affections.
He was also very interested in my percosets.
After about a week I still hadn't touched the pills.
They didn't interest me and aspirin did the trick.
James on the other hand kept asking me if he could sell them since I wasn't going to take them.
I said no.
Then again, no...
And again NO.
I told him I am not a drug dealer the answer is no.
A week or so after I thought the subject was dead I was driving home from work.
It was a normal day, nothing special. It was a normal drive home, typical 5pm traffic.
All of a sudden the breath was taken right from me.
It was as if someone reached into my chest and just emptied my lungs.
All I could think was, oh my God I have to go home and check my percosets.
Call it intuition, call it what you want.
It was like I was hit by this... knowing.
I knew I had to go home and check those pills.
I was 30 minutes from home and tried to focus on driving...
It was silly of me to think James would betray me. He wouldn't steal from me, right?
Would he?
The doubt made the rest of the drive unbearable.
I was going crazy, there is no reason I should even be having these thoughts. James hadn't even brought up the pills since I told him to drop it.
The second I got home I rushed to the table where I left the percosets.
The pill bag was still there.
Still unopened... I breathed a sigh of relief.
See I was being silly.
I put the bag down but something urged me on, something told me to open the bag...
I picked up the bag and saw there was enough space to squeeze the pill bottle out through the staples. So, for the first time, I opened the pill bag and took out the bottle.
I looked at the label. There should have been 30.
I dumped the pills into my hand and counted.
2,4,6,8....15
There were only 15 pills.
Half of them were missing.
For the second time that day the breathe was knocked out of me.
James stole from me.
And I knew it.
That night we went out. I pretended like nothing was wrong and gave James several opportunities to tell me he had taken the pills. I even said that I might take one when I get home because my knee was really bothering me... he didn't even miss a beat. He told me I should if I was in that much pain.
When we got back to my apartment I picked up the pills and told him I knew he took 15.
He tried to deny it at first but then he admitted he sold them to his friend. He told me he'd give me the money if I wanted it. I took the pill bottle and whipped them at him and screamed "For the last time I am not a fucking drug dealer!!"
Before I told him to leave I asked him when he took them.
He told me he got to my apartment around 5pm. He wanted to get in and out before I got home from work. It was the exact time I got the feeling rush through me.
I had nothing more to say, I told him to leave and asked for my key back.
I needed to get him out of my life and fast.
I knew that he would come crawling back and I knew I would take him back. I needed to make him hate me. I decided I was going to deliberately cheat on him, I would make him leave me.
A week later I put my plan into action. I stayed out all night.
The morning after, James came over demanding to know where I was. I looked him straight in the eye and told him I was with another man.
He threw a cup at my head. He missed, barely.
He said he hated me.
Finally,
I was free.
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